Tuesday, February 5, 2008

It's time to look beyond Kenya today ....

Here is a small sample of our local daily headlines;

"Residents distress cry as blood spills on the mountain side"
"Road blocks manned by murderous gangs"
"More property burnt in border chaos"
"Food shortages as fleeing families crowd camps"
"Militia rules Mt Elgon"
"Man killed in attack raid at trading centre"
"Kenya Red Cross say more than 1,000 people killed in post-election crisis"


- and sadly, this has been the same for the last one month, but then I logged onto the BBC website to see if perhpas they may have cheerier news across the seas and boy do they .....
Well, well, look at this ;


High heels 'may improve sex life'

Wearing higher heels - may improve your pelvic floor muscles and in doing so boost your sex life, a study suggests.


and .......

Viagra


Pelvic floor exercises 'help men too'

Pelvic floor exercises have long been recommended for women - now researchers say they could help men too.

The exercises were found to help men with erectile dysfunction as much as taking in Viagra.




Well people how
terrific is that? Best we get the Honorable Mwai Kibaki and his rival, the Honorable Raila Odinga into a pair of high heels sharpish as they always say a distinct lack of sex makes men incredibly grumpy, so this must surely be the key. Boost their sex lives and then they will become much more agreeable.

I'll just
nip down to the Nairobi Serena Hotel and let Mr Annan know that they should all be tarting round in heels, get themselves a little more sex, a little less viagra, and we could all live happily ever after.

Oh yes, yes, yes, I am so excited - i'm off to choose for them .......





Now I think Kibaki will look fab in these.












And these will go perfectly with Raila's ODM colours don't you thin
k ........

9 comments:

BabaMzungu said...

With a bit of luck, while "our leaders" are teetering around in this wonderful footwear. they will fall and break their necks - end of problem!

Gorilla Bananas said...

Quite a few people have been fascinated by the high heels story. I think Kenya needs an iron-willed dominatrix in high heels to take the reins. What do you say, Ms Chick?

Anonymous said...

I had wanted to say that our leaders were already teetering on the brink ... but Dad Mzungu has beaten me to it!!

Ms Chick is perfect candidate for president. But will need whip to go with thigh length boots, of sensible height, to keep rabble in line! She will need to be able to put the boot in pretty smartish without the embarrassment of falling over while so doing!

My vote is allocated...

Mzungu Chick said...

DM - Not sure that'll help at this stage because the 2 sides will just accuse each other of sabotaging their shoes!

Mr Bananas - Now that sounds like a superb challenge! People say I'm very scary and I have some fab high heels in my wardrobe let me tell you! - Actually I'm not scary at all, I just do 'loud' a lot to hide my insecurities, but hey no-one needs to know that do they! :-)

Mzungu Chick said...

Jersey Taxi - Thanks very much for your vote - and who's to say I don't already have rather long whip lined up for such an occasion!! Not sure if I can do 'sensible' though, even with heels.

BabaMzungu said...

... but it would certainly bring a light-hearted angle to the discussions - I can see the BBC headlines, "Kibaki sabotaged my high heels" accuses ODM leader.

Or vice versa. I don't want to seem predjudiced. I'm not. I just want peace for the Kenya I know and love.

Anonymous said...

Dear MC,

I am a few days old to your blog, and, where have i been all its life?? I was searching the web for Kenya news perspectives to send to my head office (Canada, they'd refused to pay my Jan salary, arguing that from what they have seen in CNN, its not possible anybody is alive in Kenya). Its great, and beautifully updated. whatever gives you such pragmatism please share it with the 'negotiators' when you go dropping the high heels...

aims said...

Those are the craziest shoes I have ever seen!

Mzungu Chick said...

DM - You're probably right, we could do with a bit of 'light-hearted' at the moment.

Ajna - Thanks for that and don't you worry I'll be sure to stick my 5 cents worth in if I ever get face to face with Mr Annan that's for sure. :-)

Aims - wicked aren't they. Am thinking of ordering a large stock and then setting up a clinic to set broken ankles!